Thank you, Zac Simons, with https://www.zentoriwellness.com/, for being my guide on a mindful outdoor experience. It helped me connect better with myself and gain greater peace and judgment-free acceptance of who I am today.

I’m not new to mindfulness and meditation. I teach a mindful art class twice monthly, meditate most mornings, and teach clients mindfulness skills. So, while I was eager to participate in this mindful outdoor experience today, I didn’t expect to be so touched by the experience. I am going through some significant life changes and experiencing feelings of grief, sadness, uncertainty, and fear as I navigate this. I believe today’s experience of using my senses in nature gave me a helpful perspective that will help me get through my current changes and challenges more easily. I thought I would share this hoping it can help someone struggling with difficult change.

We were first encouraged to walk without looking down as we started the walk. Trust that our feet knew how to navigate the way and keep us from harm.  I was unsure of this as I have a healing broken toe, and, I’ll be honest, I tend to be vigilant about potential obstacles and dangers in my life. It’s difficult for me to trust and allow things to unfold as they will.  I like to be prepared and control my journey as much as possible.  At least that’s the “old” me. I’ve been working on trust and letting go for several years.   So, I decided to try for as long as I felt comfortable.  I was surprised at how easy it was. I felt even less concerned about tripping than when walking and vigilantly watching for the next possible obstruction. I walked with flow and ease. I don’t think I would do this on every hike, but this path was reasonably even and well-paved—a metaphor for life. There are times we need to be more vigilant and protect ourselves.  Although, many times, it’s best to allow life to unfold without trying to anticipate or control each step. 

Sight

By not looking down so much, I could focus on the nature around me.  It was a beautiful day.  Some clouds, a bright blue sky, and the sun popping through the trees. The first thing I noticed was the many fallen trees and branches. I had never seen this before on any previous walk.  Were there more dead trees here, or was I just more aware?  I’m not sure. What hit me was that despite the fallen trees all over, new ones were beginning to grow around them. I noticed new branches growing on trees that had lost large branches, and I saw new small trees growing next to large fallen trees. They were all together. One’s life ended, and the others were beginning. 

I started to contemplate my life. The loved ones I’ve lost, the major life changes I face, friends that moved away, the relationships that have ended, and my kids growing up and out.  While I miss the people no longer in my life, they are still around me. They are in my heart, and I will always feel their presence. When we have open spaces, we fill them with new ones. I have filled some spaces with new friends, loved ones, and experiences.  They are the new branches that are growing on my tree.  They haven’t replaced the old ones. They are just the branches growing now.  Just like there is space in the forest for them all, there is space in my heart for all my loved ones present and gone. It’s the natural process of life. Birth and death. Nothing in physical form lasts forever.  The problem is we become attached and then experience suffering with loss.  The attachment is what causes the suffering. The feeling and belief that it should last forever. That we can’t tolerate the loss.  So, I’m learning (I’m a slow learner with this) to accept these changes and losses as a normal part of life. When I can do this, I suffer less.  This is not to say that we won’t grieve or experience sadness, but we can spare ourselves the suffering.

A feeling of peace washed over me. A sense of calm and connection flowed throughout my body as I felt surrounded by the birth and death of nature.

Hearing

Next, we shifted to our sense of hearing, where I quickly noticed the sounds of the various birds.  Today, the distinct sounds of the birds struck me.  You are aware of so much more when focusing on one sense at a time.

Some birds had a whistle or chirp, some hoot, and others a loud croak.  I started to wonder if the bird’s personalities matched their sounds. Despite their differences, I realized they were all in the same forest, flying in the same sky and making distinct sounds. Like humans, some can be loud and outspoken, others soft-spoken, some seek attention, and others prefer not to be noticed.  I could imagine this community of birds with their various personalities interacting with each other way up in the sky, just like we do.

One bird was very loud, making it hard for me to hear the others.  I wondered if the other birds were annoyed. I don’t think so; I imagine people studying birds know the answer to this question.  I allowed my mind to wander again and thought about the different people in my life and how we all have different voices and ways of communicating. Some people I communicate well with. It’s almost effortless. For others, I am irritated by their harsh tone and need to monopolize the conversation. Some find it difficult to express themselves. For the most part, though, I’ve learned to accept them all. I’m working on non-judgment—another very difficult process.  A very difficult lesson I have learned is that we don’t have to spend time with those who make us uncomfortable or unhappy. We can spend time with the people we communicate and relate best with. The people we feel at peace and safe around. Our nervous system is our guide.  You will know if you pay attention to your body.   I’m working on that as well.

Touch

We were encouraged to choose something to pick up and touch. I chose a small green leaf shaped like a heart. I noticed how smooth and shiny it was on one side. And the other side was rougher and had veins that popped out. Like people, we have soft places and some not-so-soft places. We have edges and rough spots. Just like trees, rocks, flowers, and leaves, all our places are what makes us unique.   It also occurred to me that time and weather affect the appearance and feel of rocks, trees, leaves, and flowers, just like our life experiences and time influence our inner and outer appearance.

I have been struggling with accepting some of my rough spots and scars. The not-so-beautiful parts of my inner and outer self seem glaring right now.  Fortunately, being mindful of the beautiful living things around me today helped me inch closer to accepting all those rough spots.  We all have them; after all, I’m not alone. I’m not the only person who has inner and outer flaws. The flowers, trees, rocks, and leaves aren’t removed from the forest because they aren’t perfect.  Instead, they continue to grow and evolve until they have reached the end.  All together. There is room for all, no matter how broken, wilted, or loud they are. Peace flowed through me again. Even deeper this time.

Smell

When guided to focus on my sense of smell, I was immediately uplifted by the smell of Spring. It has such a different scent than Winter. I could smell flowers, dirt, and the musky smell of bark. I started to think about how much I love Spring and Summer. I don’t particularly love the winter, but there are parts of Fall and Winter I love. I enjoy the colors of the leaves, pumpkins and hayrides, and the holidays.  There is something to enjoy and treasure in every season of life.  It reminded me of how I dread and fear change and transition, and I’m going through some massive ones right now.  I remember when my children were first born, holding them tightly and staring at them, trying to memorize every beautiful detail of their amazing faces. Also, taking in their sweet smell, touched their soft skin and listened to the sweet sounds they made.  I wanted to etch it all in my mind and heart. Never forget. I wanted to hold onto this precious time. I was already anticipating with dread the day they would grow up and move on.  With each new phase, I had to remind myself to focus on the excitement of what was happening NOW instead of trying to hold onto what had already passed.

I was reminded again today that with each new season of my life, I can focus on what is NOW instead of trying to hold on so hard to what has ended. I can treasure the memories of the past seasons, hold them in my heart, and never have to let them go, but I can also move forward and enjoy the excitement of the NOW and the next season.

I felt so incredibly much in this hour and a half of being in nature.

“Look deep into nature, and you will understand everything better.”

Albert Einstein

It is true. Nature has a way of connecting us to our inner selves and helping us gain perspective on life. I am grateful for the time spent in nature today. It was a much-needed reminder to stay connected to what matters—myself, my loved ones, and the beauty of this world around me.  It was a beautiful reminder of how things will always change, and I need to remember that this is part of life’s beauty—the ebb and flow.  Nature can teach us so much about ourselves if we take the time to listen.

If you are interested in participating in an outdoor experience, contact https://www.zentoriwellness.com/